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On Tuesday, when I woke up and heard the news of Arnold Schwarzenegger having a “love child,” my thoughts went to his wife, Maria Shriver. As a woman, I felt her humiliation, her pain, her disappointment. And the next day when it was reported that Patrick, his son with Maria, had changed his name on Twitter from Patrick Schwarzenegger to Patrick Shriver, I felt the pain of his two children; Arnold had broken their trust, and stomped on the image of him being their hero.

But who paid the highest price?

It’s the 14-year-old boy who was deprived a father’s love for 14 years. He is now practically an adult, and neither Arnold Schwarzenegger nor his mother, Mildred Patricia Baena can ever make up for the fact that a father wasn’t there for his first steps, his first tooth, his bedtime stories, skinned knees, childhood struggles and triumphs, his entry into adolescence…

How can you take away the hurt of knowing that you had a father all these years, but he chose a career in politics over being able to hold you in his arms? Yes, he may be set for life financially. He may never want for any material possessions. But that will never be proper recompense for the emotional void for the past 14 years.

This single most important decision voluntarily made by Schwarzenneger scarred this young man for life. He passed on all the risk factors for the following:

* dropping out of high school
* committing suicide
* experimenting with drugs
* running away from home
* coming in contact with the penitentiary system

He started his son’s life by dealing him a losing hand — being raised by a single mom.

Arnold, you may live on as hero in the movies of yesteryear, but your actions are far from a superhero. This Father’s Day, look at the mirror… And while you’re at at — how are you going to win the hearts back of your other two children?

I am disappointed and disgusted.

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